Hayden Panettiere‘s former boyfriend Brian Hickerson told reporters he wishes her tragic death was merely a bad dream, adding that he has shed 40 pounds since the incident.

According to TMZ, Hickerson said, “I keep hoping this is just a terrifying nightmare,” while describing how the weight loss reflects his ongoing emotional turmoil.

He also noted that the actress’s family chose not to invite him to the private farewell, explaining that he “understands the situation is delicate.”

Less than 24 hours before the actress was found unresponsive, witnesses spotted the pair together at Los Angeles International Airport, confirming they had spent time together shortly before the fatal event.

Emergency crews responded to a 911 call reporting a suspected overdose and cardiac arrest; medics later confirmed the 36‑year‑old actress had died at the scene.

Police recently detained Hickerson after a drunken altercation at a downtown bar, adding another legal complication to his already turbulent post‑tragedy period.

Sources close to the investigation said authorities are reviewing his movements on the day of the actress’s death, though no charges have been filed related to the overdose.

Fans and observers will continue to watch how the case develops as more details emerge.